‘This amazingly lifelike invention offered stirring words that should soothe … millions of Americans who desire national unity…’
(Deroy Murdock, Liberty Headlines) Where was President Donald J. Trump during Tuesday evening’s State of the Union address?
The racist, sexist, immigrant-hating, cruel, anti-Semitic monster who is denounced continuously by his Democrat/media/Left critics was AWOL. My theory? He was sequestered in an undisclosed location and replaced with an advanced animatronic device.
Unlike the Trump whose dark portrait the Left paints daily, this amazingly lifelike invention offered stirring words that should soothe blacks, women, immigrants, the infirm, Jews, and millions of Americans who desire national unity.
Trump the Racist
Every day, Trump’s detractors call him a racist. “We have a president who is racist,” Sen. Sherrod Brown, D-Ohio, insisted Sunday on the NBC News program Meet the Press. But the Trump-like apparatus spoke touchingly about granting clemency to Alice Johnson, a black woman who was imprisoned for nearly 22 years for a non-violent, first-time drug conviction.
He also movingly introduced a black man named Matthew Charles, the first inmate released after President Trump signed the First Step Act, a criminal-justice-reform bill which, the Trump contraption explained, “reformed sentencing laws that have wrongly and disproportionately harmed the African-American community.” He added: “Matthew, on behalf of all Americans: welcome home.”
Trump the Sexist
Trump also is a sexist, to say the least. Sen. Bernie Sanders, Socialist-Vt., last October called him “the most racist, sexist, homophobic, bigoted president in history.”
“All Americans can be proud that we have more women in the workforce than ever before,” the well-oiled Trump machine said.
“As part of our commitment to improving opportunity for women everywhere, this Thursday we are launching the first ever Government-wide initiative focused on economic empowerment for women in developing countries.”
Trump the Xenophobe
Trump hates immigrants. As Rep. Barbara Lee said Tuesday via Twitter: “The president is once again using a national stage to push a divisive, xenophobic, anti-immigrant agenda.”
But Trump 2.0 saw things quite differently.
“Legal immigrants enrich our Nation and strengthen our society in countless ways,” he said. “I want people to come into our country, but they have to come in legally.”
Trump the Bully
“The president’s consistent demonstration of cruelty” annoyed The Atlantic’s Adam Serwer. “Trump galvanizes his base with invectives that target those who are suffering.”
And yet the Trump stunt double introduced a guest in the gallery named Grace Eline. Though just age 10, she raised $40,000 to fight cancer while battling it in her own brain. “Grace,” he said, “you are an inspiration to us all.”
He added: “Many childhood cancers have not seen new therapies in decades. My budget will ask the Congress for $500 million over the next 10 years to fund this critical life-saving research.”
Also in the pipeline: “My budget will ask Democrats and Republicans to make the needed commitment to eliminate the HIV epidemic in the United States within 10 years. Together, we will defeat AIDS in America.”
Trump the Nazi
After reminding his audience that the U.S. Embassy in Israel now is in Jerusalem, the Trump automaton said, “We must never ignore the vile poison of anti-Semitism, or those who spread its venomous creed. With one voice, we must confront this hatred anywhere and everywhere it occurs.”
The Trump doppelgänger then spent several minutes applauding his guests—Judah Samet, a survivor of the deadly shooting attack on Pittsburgh’s Tree of Life Synagogue; Joshua Kaufman, a Dachau survivor; and Herman Zeitchik, a World War II veteran who liberated that Nazi concentration camp.
The Trump robot who spoke Tuesday night appeared warm, genuine, and sincerely interested in inspiring Democrats and Republicans to pursue American greatness. If this talking mannequin sticks around, let’s hope he succeeds.
Meanwhile, the Secret Service should launch an immediate search for the Donald J. Trump who gets socked around the clock in Democrat speeches and network newscasts. That Trump must be in a basement somewhere, banging on the door and begging to be freed.
Deroy Murdock is a Manhattan-based Fox News Contributor, a contributing editor with National Review Online, and a senior fellow with the London Center for Policy Research. Michael Malarkey furnished research for this opinion piece.